MaryBeth LaMont

I have never seen Stonehenge. It has long been on my list of places to go and things to see. I wonder now if London and Windsor are as close as I will ever get to Stonehenge. So many things I had once hoped to do, see or be have been cast along the side of life’s road. Others have come and gone. Some were as great or better than anticipated, others just a brief blip on the radar screen, and, of course, some disappointed.

Many in older age look back and reflect upon both what they have done and what they have left undone. Young adults instead look ahead to what they hope to do in the years ahead. I wonder how often our looking ahead ends up matching, at least to some degree, our looking back.

I notice for myself I spend more time looking in the rear view mirror now than I once did. For many decades it was eyes on the road ahead with only an occasional glance behind to see if any of life’s traffic was catching up to me.

People, and it seems, Americans in particular, are all about goals and accomplishments; about doing. One of the things those of us who have had some time of living have realized is that life is not all about what we have done or might yet do. Important as where we have gone and what we have seen may be, that, even coupled with what we have done, is not enough to summarize a life. We are more than what we have done and where we have been. And we are more than our potential.

Every time I meet with a family to talk about their recently deceased loved one as we plan a memorial service or funeral, I am struck by the person’s life. I am often struck by what God was up to in this person and how God used a very unique person and personality to touch others. After about 250+ of these experiences over the years, I have yet to find a formula to share that would be helpful to anyone as to how to use their life so God may touch others. I have yet to discover a step 1,2,3 program to follow so one might have maximum impact and God have optimum opportunity to work through a person.

There may be, however, one thing I have seen in common among those many saints before us that is useful: be yourself. Be the person God has created. Use the gifts God has given you. Don’t worry about gifts you do not have. Sleep well in spite of things left undone or places and experiences not had. God didn’t create any of us to be like some other. Nor did God create us to check off deeds or places on some scoresheet. God created us to be like us.

I smile sometimes listening to people talk about teachers or family members. Often they poke some fun at little quirks or, shall we say, unique habits some other has. Yet as they speak, their mouth curls up into a smile. Somehow even the quirks and strange habits of those around whom they spend time seem to mean something to them too. There is an appreciation for people as they are or were. God can even use our oddest characteristics to touch others.

In this Easter season the scriptures proclaim new life. The old is put to death and the new rises. Yet God does not raise up some new strange person. God raises up the same person, gaffes, quirks, head shaking moments and all. God raises up unique persons to continue to be a unique person however new.

Many times talking about someone’s strange ways is a way to say we care about that person. That person and their life means something or meant something to us. It means so much we even, and perhaps especially, recall the strangeness as well as the more expected way someone touched us. God doesn’t simply smile at our strange ways, God jumps in and makes use of them. God will jump in and make use of them. What matters most is not what we have done or might do, but whose we are. What matters most is that we are children of God. God will use us, God does use us.