January is frequently a time when therapists see an uptick in people making appointments because they are especially stressed. Stress is common to the human race and many like to offer simple 1, 2, 3 steps to either avoid it or make it disappear. If we can really do such things, was it really stress?
I wonder if Jesus was ever stressed. Certainly, he had some concerns. On the cross he made sure his mother was cared for. At times he got in a boat or otherwise got away from the pressure of crowds and demands. This is why we have such things as church camps and retreat centers. In addition to providing programs of learning and growth, they serve as quiet, reflective places to get away and unwind.
Stress often serves to expose us. In times of stress we see who is anxious, who is calm, who deals with things and who is indifferent. We learn who is strong and who is not. Many times stress takes over not because we are not strong, but because we misunderstand what strength is and think being strong is simply some ability we have or do not have.
Being strong begins long before we have to encounter an experience. It is working on and developing attitudes and skills regarding ourselves and regarding stress. Being strong is not deluding ourselves. It is not trying to be someone or something else, but allowing ourselves to be just who we are. That is real toughness. It is being content to be the one God created you to be to face stress as you, not some other.
When stress arrives we can choose to go back to safety or forward to growth. Strength is deciding who we want to be prior to any adverse experience so we can work toward that person when stress attacks. None of this is collection of platitudes. This involves hard work on our part. It involves allowing ourselves to be stressed, embracing the reality of where we are, who we are, and what we have to do. It involves not going it alone, often particularly when we feel like we want to withdraw and be alone.
We see tough talking men and women as strong and powerful. We don’t see Jesus as one of those, quite the opposite. Strong talk can develop a callousness with little or no concern for others, again the opposite seen in Jesus. Yet who was stronger than Jesus? In a quiet, determined, straight-forward way Jesus faced both his critics and authorities who opposed him. Jesus was more concerned that his message about God and God’s loving embrace was proclaimed than Jesus was concerned for his own life. Yet, no martyr complex, no “woe is me” whining or accusing, just plowing forward.
Our Christian faith is not about a stress-free life. If anything, living a life called Christian brings on an additional amount of stress. Following Jesus means doing hard things. It involves cross bearing, sacrificial acts for the sake of others. Acts that are stressful.
If we want new life, we cannot retreat into the old. It probably wasn’t all that safe there anyway. The call of Jesus into the good news of the Gospel is a call to become strong even to the point of admitting and experiencing weakness. Such willingness is the true test of strength.